Hi Beautiful People,
I originally wrote this blog ages ago. I thought it imperative to re-share on National Anti-Bullying Day (with a bit of a re-vamp).
I watched the movie “A Girl Like Her” on Netflix which prompted this blog. Have you seen it? If not, I HIGHLY recommend you watch it. It’s about bullying and it’s effects, yet goes much deeper to understand the behaviour also.
The blurb: “A hidden camera and a documentary being filmed on campus help a bullied, suicidal high-schooler turn the tables on her queen-bee tormentor.”
I was viciously bullied all through my school years. I was naturally curious though I never anticipated what came next.
As I sat watching the start, I realised it wasn’t just a movie. This was real life. I noticing something interesting.
The girl being bullied, was beautiful! Beautiful hair, nice clothes, porcelain skin, gorgeous eyes and I thought to myself “why her? She’s beautiful?!” There was nothing obvious as to why. This is a vital point. It can happen to absolutely ANYONE. I was an easy target being of the lower class and physical features which made me stand out as different, I only thought it happened to people like me.
Tears formed early on, I knew there would be more. I’ve never seen someone else’s story. This was in real-time. Not a movie. Not fiction. It’s Live footage. Her deepest and darkest moments are all captured. She thought her only way out was suicide! *Heads up – it’s part of the film though it’s not physical.*
Social Media makes it all too easy for others to have access and taunt and torment others these days. This means bullying can happen 24/7 now. Kids don’t endure pain during school hours only! Enough is Enough.
She had the support of one amazing friend, it unfortunately wasn’t enough. The young girl didn’t anybody to see the footage for fear of making it worse. I got it. Immediately. It’s hard to speak up as it often makes it worse which needs to change! (So glad we have anti-bullying days and movements now.) It’s still not enough. We need to create environments kids feel safe to speak up, even if their voice shakes.
The movie portrays how kids react to bullying (or don’t react) and standby, watching and allowing it to happen without doing anything. It was helpful to hear their perspective. We need to know all sides. I always wished someone would come to my aid, stood up for me. I can understand why they might not have. This is the information we need.
The camera included the girl who was bullying. The movie showed her home life. It became obvious (in this particular instance) to see why her behaviour was as it was. A dysfunctional family. In zero way does this excuse anything, we must first seek to understand what’s going on behind the scenes. We aren’t born cruel.
This movie is so real and raw, some would say intrusive. There is no deceit and both sides of the story are shared fairly without bias.
The most important part of this story came to me in a little light bulb moment. The most important person and part of this story, is the person doing the bullying.
**In no way do I mean the person who’s been suffering isn’t important.**
Whilst a lot of focus is put on those being hurt, we cannot forget about those with bullying behaviour. There are causes behind it. They need help too.
AN OSCAR DESERVING MOVIE
I have never cried so hard because of a movie. This movie tore at my soul. I was doubled over. Gut wrenching sobs as I watched what was on my screen. (This reaction was solely because of my sensitivity to my past and empathy!) I am glad I was home alone. I was a MESS!!
Major credit to the producers of this film, it was tragically magical. Oscar deserving.
I cried for many people. Families. Kids. Friends. Other victims. And for me. There were moments of pure relief where the breath I didn’t know I was holding onto was released. I could relax, along with moments like above! It was intense, yet beautiful.
A truly moving film.
MY REASON FOR SHARING
We need more awareness. Need to save lives and put a stop to Teens feeling their only way out is suicide.There are other ways. Please, Speak Up! Even If Your Voice Shakes!
I understand those who bully, or are unkind, rude, deliberately hurtful and inflict pain on others, are those most in need of love and support. They need kindness and support more than anyone. It can be difficult to see from this perspective if you or a loved one has been a victim of bullying. We’re not thick skinned or wise enough to be aware of this during the time. If we can use this information and knowledge, we have the power to change lives.
THIS MOVIE CAN SAVE LIVES
As heart breaking as this film is, the power of it has the ability to make a real difference. This can save lives!! (Unfortunately this is now the world we live in where we need to try and save the lives of teens.)
I believe this should be watched by everyone. Kids need to understand how their actions affect others. Also to know their pain is also important.
For sufferers of bullying to understand they’re not alone and to find the courage to out and speak up, even if their voice shakes.
For bystanders to find the courage to speak up and stand up for others who may not have the strength themselves. They too have power to make a change.
For parents to ensure the responsibility doesn’t fall on the school or teachers to educate their children and empower them to be kind.
Lastly, and probably most of all, for teachers, schools and community boards to see the real effect of bullying and make it zero tolerance. This happens under their noses everyday. Too many say they have a zero tolerance policy yet do nothing about it. Enough is enough. KIDS LIVES DEPEND ON IT!
Do something. Do anything. Share this blog. Speak with your child. Speak with your school. Check their phones. Do Something. Do anything. You might just save a life!
I urge you to remember those who tend to be the most cruel, unkind and hurtful are sometimes those who are in need the most.
Choose Kindness. ALWAYS.